Panics of ageing

Dear DGG Team,

I turn 30 this year, and this milestone scares me a lot. I want to have an optimistic mindset approaching this age, but I also know how last year went: friends travelling outside the country, new jobs, and even some marrying.
I had the excuse of age on my side, but now that won’t hold anymore. I am afraid that I will fail at the goals I want to achieve before I turn 30, and how broken I would be if that happened. I want to be optimistic, but I don’t know how or where to start.

– Desmond

Hi Desmond, Thank you for reaching out to the DGG team. Society as it is now seems to be putting a lot of pressure on us to have certain things at certain ages. But the reality is different. Everyone has their own path and opportunities. These make people succeed at different paces and ages. So, comparing your life and achievements with that of your friends can result in heartache and disappointment.
Take a few moments to highlight all the things you have achieved so far…a degree, a job, a place to live, food to eat, money to buy a few luxuries like phone laptop, car etc…, a few good friends, a supportive family and many others. Focus on those for a while and see how far you’ve come. Let that sink in. Remember that comparison can steal your joy.
Instead, look at what you want to achieve in this year and make conscious efforts towards it.
Don’t dwell on things that are outside of your control but rather on those you can actively change.
Savor your present experiences and don’t focus on future failures. Because if your eye is on the finish line, you will miss out on the beautiful journey of life.
Happiness comes from within so reach in. You’ve got this!

Queen Angela Norman (DGG Counselling Service Coordinator)